Evanescent felicities....

I had so many dreams in my eyes
all those have lost in the field of lies
living under the sky of crucified realities..
seeking mercy to kill my brutal nemesis..

I don't want to run behind the truth
as I know there is nothing more to lose
my destiny is running out of my control..
what I have got is just a tormented soul..

hell is so real that runs through my vein
nothing to overhear, nothing more to gain
I'm so down that I'm blinded by my ken..
I'm existing alone with my sorrowed pain..

have I got lost, have I really come undone
could not fill up the vanity, since love has gone
don't want to find myself in a sadness all alone..
why I'm lying drained in the shadows of the sun..

I'm ensnaring myself in evanescent felicities
don't want to find myself in bedeviled memories
god please don't deny me, mercy please forgive me..
here I'm....look at me.............
Death's christening me, and life's killing me..

[[May be..this can be considered as my first poem..or may be not...!! ]]